The I Love Dave Blog

Dave does not read my blog that much- or ever for that matter. But he said he'd start this week while I am away.

So, hi honey! I love you!

Self- Depricating Humor & the Writing Life

I am completely comfortable with myself. As you should be. I have decided that for my creative non-fiction project, I am going to do a memoir. I am going to create a seperate blog to post these chapters as kind of a way to get a test audience.

I have such a fun and colorful and interesting past (as my writing mentors agree) life that I just have to reach back, pull out and put on the page. I am writing this post during some downtime at the Wilkes residency, FYI.

The Naysayers
There are always people that are going to roll their eyes. I firmly believe that is because they are envious or even worse, jealous. Many times when someone succeeeds or even just enjoys life to the fullest and can laugh at themselves, those who take things to seriously begin to mock that creative person. Many of you will know what I am talking about. A silly picture will appear and people act shocked. I would never share anything that'd I 'd be embarrassed about. But on the flip side, I want to entertain, so my stuff has got to be edgy. For example, tonight at a non-fiction meeting, I spoke with Bev D'Nofrio, the woman who wrote Riding in Cars with Boys- it was a very edgy memoir from her childhood that ended up being a movie of the same name starring Drew Barrymore. She is on the facutly here. Wonderful woman- and she really gave me some great advice and encouragment. I am more apt to listen to her than someone who scoffs at a silly picture on my blog. I love the faculty here; they understand me.

You know what? It is people like Dave Sedaris, Augusten Burroughs, Chelsea Handler, Tucker Max, Dave Barry and even almost every stand-up comic out there that PROVE that laughing at yourself and sharing your follies is a way to become successful. Self-depricating humor is something that has always been popular, but it seems that in today's society where reality shows and revealing memoirs are king. That's what works. If you happen to personally know someone who shares a funny story, why on earth would you think less of them if you laugh at people like Dane Cook and Jerry Seinfeld and the other above mentioned people-- they are sharing the same things. Does that make sense. I personally have not run into many naysayers- and if you are one, Syonora. I don't care- I surround myself with supportive people.

I had a conversation with someone tonight about this topic. He said, "What if other people call you ridiculous for something that you did one time?"

I say, "So what.... it was a five minute time in my life that made people laugh. People laughed. That's what matters." If I want to be a writer, then I also want to be an entertainer- you don't get to be an entertainer by being boring.

I think being comfortable with yourself to do something silly solely to get laughs makes you a good person, and far more fun to be around. And I am okay with that. Why are some people so serious? I look at people in my creative writing class and instantly gain respect for them because finally, people like US are together. And you know what- those in my field that ARE successful are the ones the are responsible for entertaining the REST of the world though art- novels, essays, memoirs, screenplays, plays, films, poetry and such. Do realize that television and Barnes and Noble would not exist without people like me and my peers?

If you want to write or create and someone laughs at you- even if it is a blog post- ignore them. They are no good. Not everyone will agree with everything, but you know what, I want to be a writer. I want to be successful. You don't get anywhere in life, epescially in the arts, by being a wallflower. Standing out and being remembered is key.

I am having a great time at the residency this week. I am surrounded by some of my favorite people in this world and being more inspired than ever. Just wanted to check in with my blog...
I am going to do a memoir and it is going to be fun, like me.

Cheers,
Donna

(edited for typos)

A Dark 2008

New Year's Eve was a blast at Paul's house! Awesome food (I ate way too much!), fun games (I won one!) and great people.

New Year's Day, however, left a lot to be desired-- and I hope it wasn't a sign. We stayed the night at Paul's house and returned home on the first day of January at around 11:00 a.m. Hungover, I decided that a nap would do. I slept until about 2:00 when I realized that my little space heater was no longer on. I thought maybe Dave turned it off until I saw that the clock was also off.

"Did our power go out?"

"Yes."

I went back to bed. So much for the laundry. Ah! But my laptop battery is full! I get up, go downstairs to the dining room (where I have temporary office set up until I get a new desk for the office) and turned it on. Ooops. The wireless router, which is hooked to Dave's desktop, needs power to work. So, I had no internet. I went back to bed. Dave was reading some magazines, but once it got dark around 4ish, I guess he zonked out too.

We had all the candles in the house lit and were able to use the new flashlight Dave got for Christmas. But we were so bored. And hungry. We had virtually no snacks- only marshmallows left over from our summer party and crackers. We're trying to avoid snacks. Now, we needed them for survival! Everything we had required cooking, or water. Or something.

"I wonder what this will be like at the end of the world," Dave said.

Later he said, "I bet this is how some people live all the time since they dont' pay their electric bill...."

Neither one of us wanted to go out for dinner. We partied the night before and were unable to shower. Had we known the power would go out at 2:00, we'd have planned ahead.

The lights came on a little after 11:00 p.m.

All we had on New Year's Day was our imaginations and each other. I guess it wasn't so bad after all. Just very dark.

Five Days Until Creative Writing Residency

I cannot believe how time flies. My second creative writing residency at Wilkes University starts Saturday, but I am checking into the hotel (makeshift dorm) on Friday, as are most. I can't wait to see my classmates and students from the other cohorts and the faculty again.

Sounds kind of obvious for an aspiring writer, but my resolution for life and this year is to write more, so kicking off the first full-week of the new year at at creative writing residency with fellow creative people is really just the best thing to ever ask for!

If you click on the "academia" link you can see all my posts from the last residency posted. I am hoping to have more fun this time!

Most of My Amazon Wishlist Came True

I am swimming in books and I like it. I like it a lot.

I could barely carry the bag from my mom's house on Christmas. She got me about a dozen books on my Amazon.com wishlist. I am so happy! Dave also got me Naked, by David Sedaris- a memoir of I have dying to read. And speaking of memoirs, I also from my mom recieved the much-anticiapted I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell.

Also on my Amazon Wishlist was Philosphers Without Gods, The Portable Atheist: Essential Readings for the Nonbeliever, The God Delusion (because I love reading about secularism), Chapter After Chapter: Discover the Dedication & Focus You Need to Write the Book of Your Dreams, Boom! The Voices of the Sixties by Tom Brokaw, The Art of the Personal Essay: An Anthology from the Classical Era to the Present, Stiff, Leaving the Body, The Intellectual Devotional: Revive Your Mind, Complete Your Education, and Roam Confidently with the Cultured Class, and even the new John Fogerty CD.

Since have decided to write non-fiction and most likely a memoir for my MA in creative writing, I've decided that I need to read all the fun memoirs I can find. Augusten Burroughs is my hero, but I also know I need to read David Sedaris and his sister. Also, Tucker Max.

I Hope They Serve Beer in hell is not only something that I really hope for in real life since I will probably join all the other fun people in hell, but also the name of a memoir by Tucker Max. He's horrible and mean and HILARIOUS. This was the first book that I read from my Christmas presents. I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell is freaking amazing. I am only up to Chapter Five- but just from reading this book, I know that my style is similar to his and I also know that I could be successful because I have similar material.

I think that me being a girl and writing a memoir of this style will be very cool. Chelsea Handler wrote a book about her one night stands. And Diablo wrote a memoir (like Tucker, first it was a blog) on stripping. I mean- there is a market for these self-depricating memoirs.

So- I am hoping to learn some things from my Amazon Wishlist about life. writing, the writing life and also about the 60s and the secular life. Good stuff.

Good Clean Fun at the Company Christmas Shinding

I have to thank the owners of my company for a wonderful Christmas party Friday! They really put on a great night for us, and as always, the Woodlands did a fine job of providing great service. I love my company!

I also have to say that I LOVE my coworkers. The only other place I worked where there was such camraderie and just plain wild fun was at the radio station. Everyone's dates were also cool as well, blending right in with the crazy cactus crew. (We've all been to parties where they aren't...) You couldn't ask for a better bunch of co-workers- no wonder we are voted one of the "Best Places to Work in PA!" I had a blast and so did Dave. He was out on the floor all night!

What is ironic about this is that at his own Christmas party, he was an absolute wallflower. I had more fun at this party than he did (which actually caused a tad of turmoil...) but I get it now. It's who you are with that makes it fun. That's why you can go to a shitty redneck bar and still have fun, as long as you are with cool people.

His company spent a ton of money bussing us all to New York from various locations in PA and NY, giving us a tour of the Raymond factory (he works for a dealership) and also put over 100 people up in a nice hotel for the evening. Not to mention a catered cocktail party and great dinner.... Totally a top-notch affair-- however, most people were a drag during the party itself. I am a social person and like to talk to everyone, dance (even thought I CANNOT dance), tell funny stories and just have fun. Well, imagine someone like me at a table full of duds!! No one would dance; everyone just talked shop-- which is exactly what you don't do at a holiday party-- it's the one day to let loose!

I kept telling Dave he wasn't his normal self (which upset me, because anyone who knows us, we are always fun).... I guess it's just who he was around that made him that way... because he rocked his socks off at my party and told me how much he enjoyed himself. Not that I am competitive, but I win! My party was overall better! : )

The after party was great, too. M80 was playing in the downstairs club and a few dozen of us hung out and continued to dance. Dave, Kevin, Kristen and I had a room- and since we had a room, we had access to the hot tub, which is as big as a freakin' pool- I think the biggest in PA. But, but the time me and my new friend Ben from the Call Center department made it there, our key only produced a red light-- meaning, locked. No go.

I ran up to the front desk. Two bouncers from the club were sitting on the couches - their shift was done for the evening. I asked them if I could have access to the Jaccuzi. He told me to fart in my bathtub. So, I ran back to the rooms we were hanging out it.

"Benjamin! Let's make a hot tub out of the bathtub!"

"Okay," he exclaimed.

And that's how you have some good clean fun after a Christmas party.

What I Want for Christmas - Santa can you hear me?

I'll be honest. Christmas sucks this year! Gas prices are high. And with that, everything else has gone up. I don't want my blog to be about complaining, but my goodness this year is rough! I mean, we have a long gift list. So, we're buying for everyone else first, and will probably not get each other anything this year. But there are some things that I would love for Christmas this year. So, perhaps I will buy them in January when my student loan money comes in. Thanks George Bush for making Christmas in America blow.

1. Senseo Coffee Maker and lots of coffee pods
Ever since my Labor Day trek to Suppa's, my creative writing classmate's house, I have been in love with the Senseo coffee maker. I also like the idea of coffee pods. They are just neat. Every cup of coffee from this nifty machine is fresh and frothy. I know it's a bit more expensive to buy the pods all the time, but if you love coffee like I do, man is it worth it! It makes the coffee so fast, too. I've haven't found these at any local store, but I did find them online at http://www.coffeeforless.com/ for around $70. Not too shabby!

2. A Killer Desk with lots of storage- found a cool one for about $600 at Just Cabinets
My old desk was huge and it moved four times. It was starting to fall apart-- it was that particle board stuff. So, this summer we burned it. Now, my desk is a card table. It's wobbly. And, I have no drawers to stash my clutter. I have no shelves for my reference books. I am a writer and dammit, I need a good desk. Of course I swear once I have a new desk, I will become organized. I know that won't happen, but I still need the desk! So, I found a desk with a matching hutch at Just Cabinets in Edwardsville- I fell in love with this and its still available and also on the store's website. The desk is way cooler than it looks in this picture.... has all these hook-ups and neat nooks and crannies.

3. Anything or Everything on my Amazon.com Wishlist
Maybe I'd have more money if I didn't spend so much throughout the year on Amazon.com. I hate that they know me so well. Amazon is KING of marketing and data-- everytime I go to the site, all these reccomendations pop up-- it's like they are in my head. I've worked in sales and marketing and in e-commerce and I still fall for it. I buy something nearly everytime I visit. But not everything. I still have a wishlist there. What kind of chick am I? I'd rather have books than jewelry!

4. A Harmonica
Really. I'm serious. I love the harmonica. Always wanted to know how to play.

Then there's socks and underwear, too. I guess I could go on and on-- but those are some things I've been wanting for a while now. Okay- back to Christmas card addressing. I can't believe it, but I lost my address book. I got a new, really cool address book and put some addresses in there, but never transfered everything. Now, I can't find my old one. Ten years worth of addresses!! Maybe it's in my car or something- didn't check there yet. I'm so bummed.

Merry Christmas. Here's Your Citation. A Holiday Memoir...

Since I can't mail a card through my blog, as a tiding of joy, I am sharing a memoir piece I wrote this semester-- still in it's infant stages- but I figured that hearing about the real meaning of Christmas and things like that can get old, so here is a true story about a cold, snowy December evening in 1999....

Merry Christmas. Here's Your Citation: A memoir about a tree, a cop and a slight misunderstanding.

Snowflakes. Billions of them.

A WINTER WONDERLAND
I have a driveway and walkway full of snow and my only shovel is locked in the garage. Dave is in New York with the only key.

Not that I would shovel anyway.... he'll be back tomorrow. Haha.

Don't mind trudging through the snow by any means to get to the truck, but here's hoping I can still get out of the driveway over the 8 inches behind it.


COLD HANDS
Last week it was really frigid the one night and I was on E. Selfishly, I went to the full-serve pump at the Uni-Mart on Northhampton Street. The man who pumped my gas was bundled up- except for gloves. As I signed my credit card slip with gloved hands, he said:

"I don't know how you can wear gloves!"

"I don't know how you can't," I said back.

"I dunno. I just never could wear gloves. As long as the wind's not blowing, I'm okay."

I felt sorry for him and tipped him what little cash I had, darn those debit cards.

Where did the time go?! How I've missed you!

Just a quick blog to let readers of Daily Dose o' Donna know that I am still living, breathing and writing! Just off-line!

A few updates- position changed at work-- in sales now so things have gotten busier. Have a lot to learn and a lot more to do. I am becoming a career woman- coming in early and staying late! So, that's really the main reason I have been lax on the blog. So many great things to write about too!!

In other news, I realize that I can't handle vodka. Why is it that certain alcohols hit people differently? Don't need to get into the story or anything, but when I drink beer, as usual, I am a happy, fun-loving drunk. Vodka makes me weepy. And I am RARELY EVER weepy! Anyone who knows me knows that! Haha! I just can't figure out why that happens. Don't want to call anyone out in a public blog, but someone else we know never drinks vodka. Went to a party, got too crazy, embarrassed himself and never got asked back by those folks again. But-- we've known this guy for years- and he has never been like that. So, I am very interested in learning why people react to certain things in certain ways. People say that you can't blame the alcohol, but I think sometimes you can-- and should!

Other than that, things are going well. Haven't starting my Christmas cards or shopping yet-- need to start doing that very soon!

Just wanted to give a quick update! Cheers!